Everything changed the day she figured out there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life. ~storypeople

My first memory of quotes were the Mormonads in the New Era magazine. Every month I tore them out and put them in a scrapbook. I loved them and tried to implement their message every month.

Maybe my mom knew about my obsession with quotes or perhaps she didn’t but nevertheless I found this hanging in my mirror on a 4×6 index card and written in my Mom’s very precise handwriting.
“That which we persist in doing becomes easier, not that the nature of the thing has changed but that our power to do has increased.”
I’m sure she placed it specifically where she knew I would see it often enough to never be able to forget it. I left it there always, and per her plan, it has been etched in my memory.

It used to apply to back 2 1/2′s off 3 meter. Then it applied to conquering and ridding my life of the unwanted. Now it speaks to me as a mother. I remember when I used to wonder how I would handle two kids. Then I wondered the same thing when I had three. And now occasionally I pat myself on the back with my four. Persistence!
Yes, there is a special place in my heart for a well written snippet of inspiration that has the power to take you to another level.

I am inspired by many things, many people, but most recently by a particular book that’s been around since the 1960′s.
“The Greatest Salesman in the World.” By Og Mandino.  You should read it. Everyone should. It might not be your favorite book but I’ll back my recommendation and say that it will be well worth the hour or two it will take you to finish. Eventually I’ll quote my favorite parts for you, but first I’ll wait till you have the chance to read it for yourself.

OK, I can’t help myself. Here’s just one of the gems in this book (although not my favorite):
“The prizes of life are at the end of each journey, not near the beginning; and it is not given to me to know how many steps are necessary in order to reach my goal.  Failure I may still encounter at the thousandth step, yet success hides behind the next bend in the road. Never will I know how close it lies unless I turn the corner. Always will I take another step.”

And in case you want to thank me for this introduction-

You’re welcome.

I’ve let my workouts take a back seat since the Spudman. Things got busy and priorities had to be shifted but now that school has started and schedules are normalizing themselves it’s time to busy myself with good habits before the bad ones solidify. So Monday morning before the sun was up I went spinning. (Guess I’m still not ready to throw the towel in with the bike yet.) It was kind of fun, kind of not. A 10 x 10 room packed with bikes and sweaty bodies with barely enough elbow room is a little gross. Maybe that’s why they turn the lights down? But the music play list was hot and kept my legs pushing and the video of athletes racing in the Ironman was enough to keep my competitive spirit burning. And eventually when that got old there were enough quotes on the wall to keep my mind off my burning thighs just long enough to finish the class.
Have I mentioned before how I love a good quote? Because I really do. The walls were full of good ones but this is the only one that was short enough for me to remember.

“You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only option”.

Not a bad way to start my day. All this and I still made it home with time to shower before the little’s alarm clock chimed that it was time to really start my day.

]]> http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?feed=rss2&p=3441 0 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=2450 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=2450#comments Fri, 27 Aug 2010 19:41:59 +0000 jenny http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=2450 Dear life,
Just thinking today about hard things. And no matter how carefully you plan and fashion your life it doesn’t always fall into place as you expect it should. And how hard it must be to watch the rest of the world continue on without missing a beat while your world has become a knot of struggles and misfortunes. Today I resented writing how sad it is to watch my baby grow before my eyes. I’m learning that some of the things I think are hard are not hard at all. They are instead wonderful and happy. Watching a baby grow right before your eyes is hard until you think of not being able to watch her grow. Sending your kids off to school and into the world is hard until you think about not being able to help and guide them through life’s tangle of mazes. No, my life is not hard. It’s easy. I am blessed and I wonder if I have not realized the magnitude of my blessings. I am being taught something I didn’t want to learn by someone I didn’t want to learn it from. There are hard things. Much harder things than I have ever known.
Although my neighbor and I share the same views of the majestic mountains from our windows, I know that what we see is very different. And while I know that was the plan, to see and experience differently, I can’t help but feel that “this” is unfair.  Sadness, anger, guilt, despair and frustration run through some hearts like a parade of pain, while others seem to skip along under the radar. Thus far I have skipped, occasionally run into a few snags and snarls, and then without much further ado resumed my pace of life.
But now I am watching another’s pace slow. A friend is fighting for time without knowing when time will cease to be an option. The cancer will eventually rob her of life. Rob her daughter of a mother. Rob her husband of a wife. Rob me of a friend and neighbor.
These are hard things.

Jenny

]]> http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?feed=rss2&p=3402 0 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3384 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3384#comments Mon, 23 Aug 2010 20:04:06 +0000 jenny http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3384 I promised myself that we’d spend the last few days of summer going to bed at a decent time and waking up with the birds but it just didn’t happen. There were too many fun things to fit in before regimented early mornings laid claim on us once again. Without missing a beat the alarm clock played it’s tune at 7am and it felt as though we picked up right where we left off.  “Up and at em ladies” is all the prodding they needed for their first day of school.

Of course there were nerves but there were also smiles and funny faces. I felt the same.

This morning these two little beauties left my care looking more grown up and mature than I last remember. They left my safe haven to go where they will learn how to pave their own road and make their own way. They left my side but not my worrying heart. I have not a thing to get done today but sit here and look at these faces and remind myself that summer vacation will come again!

Missing them and feeling especially glad to still have a couple more shadows underfoot.

]]> http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?feed=rss2&p=3384 1 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3371 http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3371#comments Sat, 21 Aug 2010 22:12:40 +0000 jenny http://www.thedahlfamily.org/?p=3371

I can’t remember the last time I went to bed without one last peek at my 4 sleeping beauties. One last glimpse to watch their chests rise and fall to ease my mind. One last tuck-in to make sure they will stay warm. One last brushing away of hair to see their beautiful faces.  One last kiss to make amends for any pitfalls in our day.  One last smile of pride before I close the door on their snores. One last prayer of gratitude offered for them. One last pleading request for a chance to do it again tomorrow. One last pinch to make sure it’s all real and not just the dreamiest dream my mind could concoct.

I love the introductions but only a fraction as much as I love the babies. And it hardly diminishes the event knowing that she’s not mine. It’s those first introductions that take your breath away. I love the way they burrow their new little unassuming bodies into your adoring arms and melt themselves into your being. It’s better than magic. Wrapping your heart and your arms around a baby is possibly the most perfect part of our imperfect world. 

Baby Sydney was no exception. Fresh from the angels, she’s another dreamy girl that makes nine “grands” amongst us. All nine were gathered together this time. Nine dreamy little girls who re-acquainted themselves beautifully. Nine dreamy little girls who danced circles around us and ate an otter pop in between every twirl. Nine beauties who brought smiles riding on their tailcoats. So happy to have nine little girls to make our growing circle bigger and better and more beautiful with each one who joins us.

There was another introduction-at least for me. The littlest of the East coast crew. Marley Belle.

She’s already one but still this was our first meeting. Her blue eyes melted my heart and her smile was good for a “get whatever you want from Aunt Jenny” card. Sigh, truth be told my heart sags a bit watching us all drive our separate ways. Wishing these nine could be neighbors so that they remembered each others’ names and we could forgo the first day of unfamiliarity. However, the effort, the sacrifice, the time of making all nine “grands” congregate in sync perhaps makes our gatherings a little more special. I love my family. The lot of them. And this trip I was particularly mindful of the “effort” that will always be worth the effort. And though there are generations before that made this family, my heart is full for the two that started us.

Clearly the introductions were the highlight of my trip. Lest you forgot (like I always do) or didn’t know, that Arizona is hot. So hot that unless their are more introductions to be made I will likely not be returning in the month of August. But one positive about the weather- if we were not already proficient swimmers we certainly became so during our week in AZ. Three times a day has a way of improving one’s skills.

“The very things that in the moment dampen our moods can later be sources of intense gratification, nostalgia, delight. It’s a lovely magic trick of the memory, this gilding of hard times. Perhaps it’s just the necessary alchemy we need to keep the species going. But for parents, this sleight of the mind and spell on the heart is the very definition of enchantment.”

What are those very things that “in the moment dampen our moods”?  Yesterday it was the four of mine coupled with about 8 more that aren’t mine that flooded through my doors. It was the constant in and out-ness of them all with their dirty feet and sopping wet suits. It was the messes. The messes that I am tired of tidying. The sticky floors that I’m tired of un-stickifying. It’s the otter pop plastics I find everywhere which are no doubt the culprit of my sticky floors. It was the belongings that don’t belong that I constantly pile by my front door to return to the neighbors. It was arguing with a two year old who knows exactly what she wants and who she wants to do it, but I do not always have the time or patience to comply to her demands. It was piles of dirty laundry, the full dishwasher, a stinky dog. Most days these motherly duties don’t bother me but today I felt dampened and defeated.
Nightfall finally came and the day that seemed to last forever finally wrapped itself up. 8 went home, 4 went into the bath, and I eventually went to bed after I mopped the floor one more time. Tomorrow is a new day and I’m hopeful my dampened mood will stay buried with the rising of a new sun. Forgotten and washed away with morning snuggles served with waffles. And on goes this species by casting spells on my heart. After all, they are enchanting and worth a few dampened days.

Plus, vacation in AZ should do us all some good too. Anxious to make the acquaintance of a couple new nieces!

I would tell you I’m doing it again next year but the wounds are still too fresh. Ask me in a few months and I’m sure I’ll be in, but until then the memories of wanting to puke the whole day after the race are still freshly etched in my mind. I pushed myself. I did well. Happy with the results BUT I did leave room for improvement. We’ll see. That being said I’m reminding myself that I did buy a bike and doing just one big race will hardly justify the expense, right?

Here’s my results. There were nearly 2000 who entered. Of those 1545 finished the race.  There were 727 girls who raced and I finished 77th. In my age-group (30-34) there were 155 girls and I finished 19th.
1 mile swim took me 19:29. -Not bad considering.
26 mile bike took me 1:15:23. -Ahhh, needs some serious work but still good for me.
10K run took me 52:06 -good considering what all comes before the run but next time I’m going for 8 min miles instead of 81/2 min miles.
Total race time 2:32:57 -goal was for under 3 hours. No complaints.

The swim for me was a bit frustrating. They say it’s the fastest swim in the country because it’s downstream and your swimming with the current but, I clearly have not had enough experience with open water swimming. Freaked me out a bit. At some point I had to roll onto my back and give my self a little pep talk where I reminded myself to breath and reassured myself that I was not going to drown. Seriously I felt a bit sea sick but luckily I didn’t get kicked too hard, no one pulled my goggles off, and despite being dizzy I found my way to my bike while stripping off my wetsuit without falling over.
The bike was rough. But then again the bike is always rough for me so no surprises there. I pushed as hard as I could and stayed between 19-20 miles per hour. It’s a humbling leg of the race. People fly by, you fight to keep up and maintain your position but your legs tell you it’s just not going to happen, so you put your head down and dig a little deeper to see if you can find more to give. And then the next person passes. That’s how it was for 26 miles. Hurts my ego folks.
The run was good. You tell yourself 6 miles is nothing after finishing 26 but running and biking are two very different sports. It’s hard to gauge how fast your legs are moving when you can’t even feel them so you just make them go as fast as they can manage until you regain sensation. But by this point the race is all mental anyway. Talking yourself through it is all you’ve got at this point. “One more bend to round, then the straight stretch where the spectators will be hosing you down with water, cross the railroad tracks and then you know the finish line is close. You give it a kick, hopefully, and then it’s over.” Done. They announce your name, hand you a bottle of water, put the medal around your neck and take back their timing anklets. That’s it. Some people experience a “high” but I’m afraid I have to vote “not me” on this one. I’m wasted and hurting, and don’t even want to think about doing another one. And yet I still find this to be fun. ? I know-go figure.

Pre-race poses with my gals and making sure I can move in my wetsuit.

No permanent marker this time but still the required muscle shot.

Trying to stretch away the pain after the race before the tightness sets in during the three hour drive home.

My self portrait and the guy who thought he needed to take his shirt off. Races are not beauty contests. We both attest to that.

Behind me is the lovely snake river where we swam.  There’s not a lot in Burley Idaho but what is there is beautiful. Carlye’s ready to move there with her horses and buy a boat and Tessa met a very nice single police officer who kindly gave us directions instead of something else (like a speeding ticket). There are possibilities in Burley. Possibly I’ll visit again next year. But just possibilities for now.